Discord Hobbit Commentary Party?

"As for myself," said Eomer, "I have little knowledge of these deep matters; but I need it not."
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Should we have a Hobbit discord watchalong?

Yes
9
38%
H*** yes
13
54%
No
2
8%
 
Total votes: 24

Elven Enchanter
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So, the sheer awfulness of The Hobbit movies has come up quite a bit both here and on the discord. Therefore, should we plan to have a discord watch along of the movies where we ridicule it to our hearts content?

The majority of afternoon/evenings (pacific time) I'm able to host and should have a DVD player for my computer by the weekend. We can figure out dates at a later time depending on interest level and time zones.
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Artanis / Éomund / Brandor / Zarâm

New Soul
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That sounds like fun, and more socially acceptable to bash verbally than in the theater (less chance of shushing and popcorn throwing!)
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Third Marshal of the Mark
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I certainly wouldn't advocate watching it for any other reason.
May the Horse be with you.

Elven Enchanter
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Also, I will add that bringing your choice of an adult beverage is encouraged, if you so choose to do so. I know I'll need a glass of something to get through certain scenes.
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Artanis / Éomund / Brandor / Zarâm

Balrog
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I won't be able to be a part of it, old computer who glitches at the mention of streaming, but I say it's absolutely necessary that we do this.

Also a drinking game!
Strange Fruit got holes in the flesh but it ain't gonn' spoil cause it never was fresh

Councillor of Imladris
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I am certainly interested, just need to know when and I will see about making time (though a weekend would be preferred)

Black Númenórean
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Dimcairien Luiniel wrote: Tue May 26, 2020 11:12 pm Also, I will add that bringing your choice of an adult beverage is encouraged, if you so choose to do so. I know I'll need a glass of something to get through certain scenes.
This combined with a group viewing is maybe the only thing that would get me to watch these movies ever again. (I think I saw the first and second ones and refused to see the third in disgust. :smiley12:)
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Sounds terrible.

I'm bringing whiskey. Name the time and I just might be there. :smiley16:


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Chef
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H-e double hockey sticks yes! It might be the only way I can ever bring myself to watch the third one.
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New Soul
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This sounds like an excellent (terrible) idea. Count me in.
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Thain of The Mark
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My schedule can be kind of topsy turvy these days but I will be there for as much of it as I can. (Saturday is my birthday though and I've already cleared the day of away-from-home plans so on the off-chance that we're ready for this by Saturday, that would be AWESOME.)
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Frost wrote: Tue May 26, 2020 11:17 pm I won't be able to be a part of it, old computer who glitches at the mention of streaming, but I say it's absolutely necessary that we do this.

Also a drinking game!
Yes!

So I don't actually know how discord watch parties work, but for people who have computers that can't handle it-- could they be on a voice channel and we'll just sync up as best we can?
they/he/mischief

Balrog
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Mine wouldn't even be able to handle a voice chat, it was basic when I bought it and that was 6 years ago, it's good for word and that's consistently all it's useful for
Strange Fruit got holes in the flesh but it ain't gonn' spoil cause it never was fresh

New Soul
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Dannng. Um, sync up as best we can, and you sip your drink and occasionally type color commentary into the discord chat, and I say it out loud in my best @Frost voice despite (and perhaps all the better for) never having heard your voice.
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Balrog
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If you ever heard someone who grew up in Texas that's pretty much me, but without the "hick" lilt, and throw in a few Spanish expletives and you're golden :smiley9:
Strange Fruit got holes in the flesh but it ain't gonn' spoil cause it never was fresh

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I'm in, preferably a weekend so I don't have to drive to work asleep!
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I'm in, preferably a weekend so I don't have to drive to work asleep!
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Elven Enchanter
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Provided my DVD player arrives and works, I could host this Saturday anytime after 12:30pm Pacific time. I have a previously scheduled Zoom conference that day until noon or so.

@Frost Sorry your computer would give a fit. Do you have a smartphone or any other device that might support voice/video chat?
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Artanis / Éomund / Brandor / Zarâm

Balrog
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I could possibly make an appearance through my phone for a little while, worth a shot at least
Strange Fruit got holes in the flesh but it ain't gonn' spoil cause it never was fresh

New Soul
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I’m going to try to join also, at least for a little bit, depending on how long the run to the liquor store takes 😆
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Third Marshal of the Mark
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12:30 pm PT is 2:30 CT, right? *is not so great at timezones*

@Gwai I need to get something to cut my vodka with, lol.
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I'll be finishing moving Saturday, but can join future ones! Woo!
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Melkor
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I'll also be finishing moving saturday. Hopefully I can join in!

Elven Enchanter
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Provided my technology works, I plan to host The Hobbit Part 1 discord party tomorrow Saturday May 29 at about 1pm Pacific Time/8pm UTC. (I think I did the time conversion correctly) I'll plan to post a reminder here about 15 minutes or so before we start and I'll post in the discord announcements section at about the same time.

To avoid overwhelming servers, it might be best to have your mic on push to talk, but we can definitely experiment between that, unmuted mics, and using the voice chat companions channel.

Bring your alcohol and your snark.
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Artanis / Éomund / Brandor / Zarâm

New Soul
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Ugh, y’all, I’m not going to make it, RL got in the way (as it does). Hopefully I can make the Hobbit 2 party, assuming everyone is still sentient after watching it! 😂
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Third Marshal of the Mark
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@Dimcairien Luiniel I will join for the first film, at least! After that it will end up being quite late my time (UK) so I may have to disappear to sleep.
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@Almarëa Mordollwen Yay! And I’m only doing one film today. I only have the first one at the moment, but if there’s enough interest, I could probably host the next film next weekend.
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Artanis / Éomund / Brandor / Zarâm

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And it’s live. Apologies in advance for poor audio quality. Discord doesn’t support audio sharing over macs, so the sound is coming from my computer speakers. I’ll see if there’s a way around this if I host another steaming.

And we’re holding it in Zoom. Link is in the voice chat companions thread on discord.
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Artanis / Éomund / Brandor / Zarâm

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Sad to have missed it! I'd be in for future weekends, and most likely free. Moving has gone well, and at least I'm not living in a huge pile of boxes (mostly) anymore.

(I will catch myself up-- it's been a while, but I think I only ever watched the first Hobbit movie...)
they/he/mischief

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I've watched all 3 once.. every time I get very very worked up, and it just got worse and worse in my opinion. :smiley20:

Has anyone watched the version where they have cut out the most offensive parts? (The 3 movies become 1 movie I think) It's meant to be truer to the book. It should be somewhere on the interwebz.. (A friend of mine had it downloaded I am technologically challenged so cant help much besides saying it exists.:smiley16:) I believe I've watched half of this version, and I did not get as angry. I can ask my friend for advice on how to find it if anyone is interested in this version.
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I haven't watched that version-- and I'm not sure if I should watch the full ones first, or do the cut ones, and then put myself through all the rest. I've seen the first, but don't think I ever got to the other two.
they/he/mischief

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@Idesinholde there are actually a ton of fan-edits to have come out, especially since the Hobbit movies were panned even in theaters. I found a pretty comprehensive list / description of them here.

@Lucifer I'd honestly recommend watching the full ones before you watch the fan edits. That way if you like the fan edits, you never end up having to watch the full ones again -- plus you'll know what they were working with, as it were.
Last edited by Androthelm on Mon Jun 15, 2020 5:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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@Androthelm -- that's fair. It's along the lines of what I was thinking. Plus, it would be great to have a framework for what has been altered.

Thanks for the link list!
they/he/mischief

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Ah OK! Thanks Androthem, that makes sense. :smiley8:
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Weathered Ent
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And hopefully my browser will support it. I just have a chrome book.
Huorn of Fangorn

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I kind of feel (having missed the last two) that I should buy the extended editions and watch them ...

Am I insane?
The Wood-elves lingered in the twilight of our Sun and Moon, but loved best the stars.

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Lirimaer I always watch the LOTR EE because the extra material (for the most part, except perhaps TTT) made the theatrical versions even better. For TH films, I've only seen the Desolation of Smaug EE and that ended up making me more angry than the theatrical. So, I haven't bothered with trying to watch the extended in the other 2 Hobbit films. I have checked online to see some individual added scenes, and was rather pleased with Beorn and the Eagles extended scenes during The Battle of Five Armies. However, I'm not sure it would be worth purchasing the EE for any of The Hobbit films, in my opinion.

For the extended scene with Beorn, if you're interested:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ESkOMBq3es8
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Oh, thank you.

I have to admit, I am in it purely for any extra views of the set in Mirkwood, and not for the spurious storyline. I have no desire to be made angry, and do indeed have a FastForward button on standby ... maybe if I find them cheap somewhere ...

I am interested that you liked the Beorn section, since he didn't look at all like I'd imagined him and was such a disappointment that, for me, it ruined my immersion - he was clearly an imposter. That EE extract is pretty cool though - good bear.
The Wood-elves lingered in the twilight of our Sun and Moon, but loved best the stars.

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@Lirimaer I am interested that you liked the Beorn section, since he didn't look at all like I'd imagined him and was such a disappointment that, for me, it ruined my immersion - he was clearly an imposter. That EE extract is pretty cool though - good bear.

Yes, I agree his look was completely off. I just liked it because the arrival of the Eagles and Beorn was the significant turning point in the battle and in the theatrical cut they get pretty much no notice. And the description of what Beorn meant in turning the battle around is a moment that's perfectly made for hollywood (in my opinion):

But even with the Eagles they were still outnumbered. In that last hour Beorn himself had appeared - no one knew how or from where. He came alone and in bear's shape; and he seemed to have grown almost to giant-size in his wrath.

The roar of his voice was like drums and guns; and he tossed wolves and goblins from his path like straws and feathers. He fell upon their rear, and broke like a clap of thunder through the ring. The dwarves were making a stand still about their lords upon a low rounded hill. Then Beorn stooped and lifted Thorin, who had fallen pierced with spears, and bore him out of the fray.

Swiftly he returned and his wrath was redoubled, so that nothing could withstand him, and no weapons seemed to bite upon him. He scattered the bodyguard, and pulled down Bolg himself and crushed him. Then dismay fell on the Goblins and they fled in all directions... The Return Journey


It's my favorite part in The Hobbit, and I was expecting much more, because it's literally a 'made for Hollywood' moment. Bolg's bodyguard is decimating the dwarves and suddenly Beorn arrives, rescues Thorin's body, comes back and crushes Bolg. How can PJ pass this up!? But, we get Fili and Kili's death which makes me feel absolutely nothing. A comically bad Bolg-Legolas fight and a not much better Thorin-Azog fight. Where the Eagles and Beorn get 5 seconds when they show up. So, really, anything that was just more than what I saw in the theatrical was going to be better. Even though, it's still probably the most frustrating part about the movie (if you can't tell :smiley9: )
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I must definitely re-read The Hobbit again soon, perhaps to my next class - I have such a good forgettery these days, I can't remember much beyond Biblo KO'd through the whole battle. Old age, you know.

While we're talking frustrations, I find Legolas the MOST frustrating thing in TH, chiefly because there's so much CGI, but also because he was so badly served by the script - which they just got off of ff.net, I think - but that's because I expected more from them. (Clearly, having seen the elf-elf-dwarf love triangle, I should have my head tested.) In battle scenes, though, I have learned to expect an OTT crapfest and mostly just glaze over until we're back to character-driven action again.

I have to say I cared very little for any of the Dwarves barring Balin, so having them as the protagonists for much of the film was a little 'hostile witness' for me.

The Eagles, who I quite like in the books, seem to be purposely portrayed as the Deus ex-machina they're purported to be in every joke in these films - coming out of nowhere in the nick of time ... And there was so much scope for far-sighted eagles being aware of what was going on in their lands, watching and then acting when it all went to s#!t.

To be honest, if they'd just READ the book to me, whilst playing Howard Shore's music and showing me their landscapes (and every set scene barring the goblin underground), I'd have loved it! Probably. Obviously the odd elf swishing about importantly in long flowing robes would be the icing on the cake. :smiley8:
The Wood-elves lingered in the twilight of our Sun and Moon, but loved best the stars.

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Where is that fabled Discord server? I have heard of it many times throughout the plaza!

By far the most annoying thing in the Hobbit was Thorin, for me. He was the cornerstone of the whole "action movie" thing where every dwarf had to be a spec ops veteran. And it so painfully obvious he is supposed to be Aragorn-like that I can't help but wonder; didn't the writers notice that the Lord of the Rings does not hinge upon Aragorn's storyline? But then again, perhaps I'm just misreading things...
“Someone else always has to carry on the story.”

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@Vorondir here’s a link to join (good for 24 hours): https://discord.gg/38GnPg

Hope we see you around on there!
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