One cannot
simply walk into Mordor, because there are but four paths, each of which is met with significant obstacle.
The first of these entrances is the Morgul Vale. Unfortunately, through the Morgul Vale lies Minas Morgul, and there our first obstacle to simply walking into Mordor lies, for before Minas Morgul itself is a bridge. Now, wiktionary defines a bridge as:
"bridge" via wiktionary wrote:A construction spanning a waterway, ravine, or valley from an elevated height, allowing for the passage of vehicles, pedestrians, trains, etc.
We see that this bridge satisfies the definition, as it "passed over the stream in the midst of the valley" (
The Two Towers, 'The Stairs of Cirith Ungol'), and also that it allowed the passage of vehicles (the Lord of the Nazgul, horsed), pedestrians (Frodo, foolhardily), and trains ("behind him still the black ranks crossed the bridge"
ibid). At this point it need be remarked upon how bridges may come to be. A bridge does not exist until a sufficient body of people come together, decide to create one, and then either do it themselves or enlist others to go about the work. This is a considerable amount of work that requires a sophisticated relationship with a body of oversight, and is, to speak plain, no simple matter. Therefore, all transit across a bridge cannot be said to be simple, unless one were to ignore the context of what engineered the situation. This blindness to history would reduce the whole question to meaninglessness, as every step taken could be inspected with no consideration for any step before it, and therefore it would be simple to walk into
anywhere, and then where would we be? Therefore, entering Mordor via the Morgul Vale cannot be seen as
simple.
The second of these entrances is the offshoot of the Morgul Vale, via the aforementioned Stairs of Cirith Ungol. But this is, as the name suggests,
stairs, and thus finds itself the second of our obstacles for simply walking into Mordor. Stairs are generally described not as being walked, but as being climbed, a verb which denotes a certain degree of difficulty, and is in other places used for transit up walls, mountains, and corporate ladders. Even at its least strenuous, stairs can be said to be
taken, which still evokes the idea of some struggle of ripping ownership from the clutches of a mysterious unnamed party. This is not a matter of ease. It is not something done
simply.
Further, the end result of this path involves passing through a great deal of spider webs. Combined with the stairs, this leaves no other alternative than to consider this passage not into Mordor proper, but Mordor's attic. This is neither a simple nor a reputable way of entering a place: it is the recourse of masked menaces, such as burglars and raccoons.
The third of these entrances is the back path to Mordor, going around it to the east in order to make use the wide stretch of its border which is not covered with mountains. While at first glance this may seem relatively simple, this holds true only if we forget that the struggle here is getting around to the back side. An army is slaughtered in the rout, when they turn their backs to those who wish them harm, but does not mean slaughtering an army is child's play, for it is in getting to the rout that the difficulty lies.
In the same vein, it is getting to the back side of Mordor which is the primary difficulty, and there is really no way to escape that this does not make it simple. Imagine, if you will, that you had lost the key to your front door, so that every single time you wanted to leave your house you would have to go out the back and walk around. Imagine if every single time you wanted to return home, at the weary end of the day, there was the increased burden of shimmying around back. Such an absurd display can never be considered
simple.
The fourth, and final, of the entrances to Mordor is via the Black Gate. But 'The Black Gate is Closed' (
The Two Towers, index). This provides an impassable fourth and final obstacle, and snuffs simplicity.
QED
