@Ercassie
Lieutenant Arnyn Dealedwen
Room 4
Guard Headquarters - December 30th/31st, night
He wasn't there to judge her. His words filtered in slowly, even as Domanol went on to do exactly that. Judge her. Judge her capabilities.
Not that he was
wrong to judge her. Not that Arnyn cared much whether he did or did not judge anything about her. Given his words and his anger, she figured that seeing eye to eye with Domanol would probably be a lost cause, now. Even on the long term. Not that she would be against trying to mend whatever trust she had broken between them. She always wanted to be on the same page as others; always opened herself up to different viewpoints if they made sense; she did not shy back from reviewing her own opinion if someone else's rang true.
But seeing his reaction, recognizing his anger threatening to make him burst apart against the walls of the room, and realizing the danger she had put Seri, Brooke and Aislin in — in this moment Arnyn simply could not see how Domanol would ever forgive her. Not even if Ava proved all she claimed to be. All Arnyn hoped Ava would prove to be. And the Lieutenant knew what kind of strain that would put on the understanding between Domanol and herself. Not to mention that Domanol's view of her wits had just crashed down into a very dark abyss.
Not to mention that
Arnyn's own view of her wits had just tumbled down straight after. Domanol's ongoing tirade outlined harshly what she could have done differently. What she should have done differently. Arnyn was already down in the mud. Domanol's lecture pushed her in deeper. Face first. Hard.
She was too raw, too battered to fight it — to mount any full or coherent defense. She did not care about the comment concerning how she looked - she wasn't that shallow. The force of the
rest of Domanol’s words, however — especially his '
What you clearly cannot' — did not simply
land. They
buried themselves in her. Further eroding who she thought...
had thought... she was.
However, even in this hollowed state, she wouldn’t just sit there and take it all without a single response. Not because she had the strength to fight back anymore — for she didn't — but because she was still
trying to cling to some
sliver of clarity. To something — anything — she still knew to be true.
While Arnyn fought an inner struggle with herself, desperately searching for a foothold now the rug of her identity had been pulled out from under her, the room was a graveyard of her silence. Domanol’s words echoed like steel striking stone. Final. Unforgiving.
And she could not refute most of it. Not when it rang so horribly true.
Even so, Arnyn didn’t lower her head. Her voice didn't break as she finally answered the storm that currently was the Raxelilta in front of her. As she tried to claw her way out of the mud.
“You might also consider you do not yet know everything I included in my report to King Elessar, before you make assumptions as to why he has not yet sent for me." Her tone was not defiant. Not even defensive. It was rather
void, as if she were disconnected from a crucial part of herself. There was no edge. No bite. Simply... the truth as she saw it.
"I can assure you that my report was very extensive. And included my planned whereabouts not only for the rest of the day - which included the theatre, and also Ava's presence there - but also for the days to come," she informed him. Before allowing: "Then again, you are right in that my current visit
here was not listed. I was only able to include what was planned and known at the time I sent my report, this afternoon, and I certainly had not guessed then that you would all end up here. "
The Lieutenant did not raise a hand to stall Domanol's response, for she assumed he would allow her space in turn, as she had allowed him. It sounded like he had lost much if not all of the respect he might have had for her, but it would be no more than the very basics of polite conversation. She still deserved that much... didn't she? In light of what she was about to share now, though, he might just decide she did not. If so, it was already out of her hands. Between all the options she could see, now, the only way forward was to lay it all out on the table for him. Clearly the abridged version was not doing anything good. The extended version may lift his fury up even higher - but at least he would know all there was to know. Arnyn had been planning on informing him, as it was, in the few days she had left to do so. And she had him here, now. This might be her best chance. And given his anger, now, it might be her only chance to tell him what she wished for him to know, before he acted on his own.
"I found out about Ava
four days ago," she told Domanol. That information was going to send him into a new fit, probably. It would surely make him think even less of her. If that was possible. Because she had had
four days to inform him of an Umbarian presence, not
one. But it had not mattered until the night before. Or so she had thought. She was too spent to contemplate that, now. Too spent to try and analyse it all
yet again. All she could do now was to inform the man across the table from her in full. Now that they were here. So he could decide just how angry he was, with all the data. So he could offer what insight he could, with all the data. It was clear to her now that she could use more insight. It was something she had been craving for a while now, but had been blocked to obtain. For the only person she could discuss things with, was Pele. And two minds...were not enough. Yet there were no other officers within the ranger unit. And Arnyn didn't like to play favorites. She knew that doing anything that even smelled like favoritism usually hurled itself right back into an officer's face.
"Four days ago," she repeated, "when my brother invited me to dinner at a house on the Fifth." Arnyn's black eyes looked empty as she met Domanol's. "Which Ava apparently purchased. The tour she gave me made it clear she had money. A lot of it, too, for not only did she purchase a house to spend a short time here, the number of furnished and decorated rooms..." Well, whatever. Adding more information on that did not matter much, so Arnyn did not elaborate.
"After dinner was over, she told me about a project of hers." Arnyn resisted tightening her hand into a tightly balled up fist. Instead, she slowly breathed out. "She claimed that project was helping the slave population of Umbar cross the border and return to their actual homes." Ava had claimed it -- over coffee. "Which... changed the tone of the evening." Dramatically. And suddenly. Not that Domanol would or should care. So Arnyn did not elaborate on
that, either. "Since that confirmed where exactly she was from."
"I questioned her, that night. About that 'project'. About her 'plans'. She laid them out for me - a network of safe houses from Umbar to Gondor, purchased and staffed by her. I thought it was too much of a coincidence she had somehow found
me, given my position, to 'help' with that project. Tercen said Ava had told him about those same plans - before he had told her about who I was," she also dimly recalled. Not that that didn't mean Ava couldn't have already known, of course. "I thought the timing of her arrival was uncanny, so I questioned her about why she had only come
now, and not any
sooner. Her response to that was that it was becoming too difficult to hide the growing number of people at her estate. That the need to bring a group of them back to Gondor had started to outweigh the danger to her own safety. And it seemed to me that the rumour of the midwinter masquerade helped, too. The notion of a dance clearly intrigued her." As shallow of a reason as it was. "She said we might help each other. She mentioned the risk to herself, mentioned the possibility of spies, she mentioned enemies - so I questioned her about that, too. How she thought she might help me. What she wanted from me. Whose spies she meant. What enemies."
"She mentioned you," Arnyn told Domanol,hervoice almost deadpan as she continued to lay it all out for him. "Not by name. But how she danced with a man at the masquerade. About how he had your accent. How he might be a spy for Umbar. Of course
I knew you were not, but I did not tell her or Tercen that. I told her
nothing. If she does turn out to be true to her word, that means it would make sense for her to have shown you hostility, given the way you... engaged in conversation, at the theatre."
"Ava admitted she did not know how she could help me. Only that she wanted to help, if I could use it." Arnyn glanced at her hands, still on the table. "I did not ask her for help with anything, although I did ask many more questions, that night. Questions which prompted her to tell me about the Temple and Pharak - how her project would be neverending if that cult was not completely removed. How he was the real problem in Umbar, according to her. She spoke of how she's been trying to combat his influence in different ways and how she has been failing. And she claimed she finally came to Gondor, because she is getting desperate. She spoke of how her mother was allegedly murdered, how her father started working in secret against the powers in Umbar - how supposedly Pharak Halsad's first act as priest was to have her father executed at the temple, after having learned of his... activities. She also mentioned that Pharak's unlikely survival after being burned alive, helped convince people he was deserving of the position as Blood Priest. I did not let on I knew anything about that."
How to continue, now, however? Admitting to how she had left Ava's house - was that something she wanted to do? Inwardly, part of her laughed coldly. What did Domanol's perception matter, now? It was already shattered.
"I had more questions, but my own brother threw me out once I asked if Ava had ever killed anyone." Even this admission did not carry any emotion. Her delivery was near deadpan.
"Clearly, neither Ava nor Tercen was comfortable with my... interrogation of her. To Tercen, it seemed heartless. To Ava - who knows. It all depends on her true nature, I suppose," Arnyn added. "I left. Because we were meeting again the next day. And because I had not heard anything that proved she meant to do anyone harm - even though I had no proof that her claims were true, either. I had told her nothing." Arnyn frowned. Heartless in the eyes of my own brother. But not careful enough, then.
The Lieutenant took a deep breath and continued, in that same toneless quality. Her black eyes were dull but steady, as if the truth was all she had left to give. The only nail left in the coffin she had built herself.
"I spoke to Ava alone, that next day. Without Tercen present. To ask the rest of my questions about who she is, her motives, her plans. I was trying to discern to what extent she might be a threat. I will freely admit I wanted to believe her. I still want to. I still hope there are people in Umbar who want better things for themselves and their countrymen." He could accuse her of being naive. It appeared that she was. A pitfall of her idealism, then?
"She claimed she did not immediately reveal her heritage or accent to me, the night before, because she was afraid I would refuse to hear her out - or worse. That where she came from, people were put in the dungeons without any proof they had done wrong. But that she also did not wish to deceive me, which was what led her to tell me about her plan and where she was from, once we'd had dinner." She looked back up at Domanol. "It reminded me very much of your nephew's friend's situation. He also feared he would end up encarcerated, if he ever returned here. He was also very... uneasy... to speak to me, because of his years-long association with pirates. It reminded me of how I had wanted to judge
him - for his character and his intentions, and not for his father or his past."
The Lieutenant blinked. Had... that... all... been misplaced? Had
that also all been a risk she should not have taken? A risk that could now condemn
everything?
It had turned out well, so far, with Trevadir. But could she be
sure, Arnyn now suddenly wondered? Should she doubt
that decision, as well? Should she have Trevadir watched, now, too? With every passing minute, the doubts at her decision-making were growing more numerous.
What
if Trevadir was lying? What
if he, in truth, still reported back to Devedir? What
if Devedir was blackmailing him with something, or someone, so Trevadir could feed him information about all the rangers were planning?
If
that was the case, then she had told Trevadir
much more dangerous things than she had told Ava.
But Trevadir cooperated, her mind whispered at her.
He told you so many things that would damn Devedir, and Umbar. He offered you valuable information.
Cold sweat ran down her back.
But so had Ava. Panic threatened to surge, to engulf her and drag her into the depths.
Nothing other than sheer willpower kept her from drowning down that line of thought. Though the panic remained, shoved down hard to the back of her mind, behind a wall of unyielding steel.
Later, she ordered herself.
One failure at a time. That was all she could handle right now.
"That day, just like the previous evening, Ava could not offer any real proof, to back up her claims," the Lieutenant said.
Just like Trevadir had not exactly been able to offer proof. Had he? Arnyn shook her head - once. Mentally, she reinforced the wall.
"Though she told me several things that I found interesting. Her description of setting free a certain woman in Umbar, years ago. Which matched perfectly with another story I knew. Down to details that could impossibly be known to anyone other than the woman who had been set free, and the person who'd set her free. I also learned she was willing to meet this woman." A breath. "Her story about a couple that had returned with her from Umbar, whose daughter she hadn't been able to find - whose name and age corresponded with a 'gift' to the Captain from the slaver who replaced Relic. A story which I have written up orders for, so we might verify that one as well. Ava had someone from her staff give me the location of the parents, so we can reunite them. She told me some things about Jenahda, too. That the Blood Guard is really
hers,not Pharak's, for example." Again, supposedly. If they could believe her.
"I figured that if she wanted to harm just me, as the Ranger Lieutenant, or my brother, the previous evening had been her perfect opportunity. When I still knew absolutely nothing, and when both of us were eating her food, consuming her drinks. She could have just poisoned the both of us then. And not have bothered with the complicated backstories, the challenging charade. I concluded that if she was playing me, she was playing at a much bigger game. And given everything she told me, in such a short span of time - she would have to be a very good and a very prepared actress. It did not sound contrived, or rehearsed. Not for a second." She'd always prided herself on being a good judge of character. Domanol had just pointed out to her why that was such a naive thing to do, though. So the words were said without sounding like she was defending her choices. It sounded like nothing more than what it was: Arnyn simply informing the ranger in front of her of the same things she had reported to the King.
"Be that as it may, I told her nothing of our plans concerning Umbar. But I did tell her that Relic could shapeshift, and that the slaver died when she had come here - with steel through the heart. One reason for that was so I could see how Ava would react. She was very hung up on the shapeshifting. Apparently that wasn't commonly known in Umbar, either. Unless that is also a lie. Ava claimed she had only heard some
rumours."
Part of Arnyn's old self returned then, to assess Domanol's gaze. "And that she had heard strange rumours about the Priest, as well. That he supposedly has dark powers. Just like his apprentice. How it had all sounded like nonsense, to Ava. But since that I was then claiming that the rumours about Relic were true, how she did not longer know what to believe about the rumours about Pharak or 'Naluthor'. She mentioned the rumour that the Priest knew everyone's secrets." She paused briefly. "I told her nothing of our own conversation, or what doubts I may or may not have about that after what you have told me. I simply told her that he could be bluffing. And that in my
own personal experience, you don't need dark powers to have a good network of spies." Ironic. How terribly and painfully ironic that was, now.
"I
did tell her that the rumours she'd heard about Naluthor being able to be in two places at once, was a lie. And when she asked what I knew about him, I told her I knew he has been active in Umbar and here in Gondor, betraying kin and country. So if she is a spy, she could report back that his cover is blown." Her index finger brushed across the tabletop. She didn't realize. "I figured I would give her some things - small tidbits of information that would interest her but not really give much of anything away. Like knowing Naluthor is Gondorian. Relic's shapeshifting. Knowing where that couple's daughter was. Some information about how my mother died. In my own attempt to get her to open up more, but also to make it less apparent that I was holding
much more important things back. For I know that I am a bad liar. She had asked about the best location for a recovery house in Gondor, the night before. I told her Pelargir, that next day. For it would be ideal if her plan was true, and if it was false then Pelargir still has a strong Guard in place, as well as a naval force."
"I asked her, again, that day, whether she had killed anyone herself. She claims not to have killed anyone with her own hands or weapons, but admitted that she has been sending sacrifices to the temple, as demanded by the priest of the Umbarian nobility. That she tried not to, once. That he simply took someone in her service, instead. And demanded a larger sacrifice next time. Ava claims she has her people looking for murderers, and that she offers
them up to the Temple." Arnyn had been dismayed, when Ava had told her. Her idealism had yelled for punishment, then. She had called Ava out on it. She had been angry.
Then.
But
now, Arnyn had nothing. For if she let any more emotion in now, she'd crumble. And she. Refused. To. Crumble.
Not here.
And sure as hell not in front of Domanol Raxelilta.
"The next time I saw Ava, was when my brother and I had agreed to go dancing, and he brought her. Despite the reservations I had already voiced, the night I met her, about him strutting her around town. Apparently her concern about spies was lessened after meeting me. Or Tercen was making her forget. That, or she was never really concerned at all. Who knows." The latter would fit with the idea of Ava playing them.
"Tercen and I were away from the table when Ava apparently dropped her Gondorian accent in front of Gladhron. He asked her about where she was from, and by the time my brother and I returned to the table, Gladhron asked
if she was helping me with the Umbar thing." Arnyn's fingers pressed briefly to her temple, as if holding the pain in — or trying to keep it from leaking further out. "Nothing else was said, that evening. Cue the endless meeting at headquarters today, in the Captain's presence."
"I called Gwestion and Gladhron in first. To brief Pele and them,
first. To introduce the brothers to the Captain. To inform Pele of how I knew them. That you knew them, as well. To clear up for the Captain how the brothers had apparently found out about the Umbar 'thing' in the first place." Another mistake, then, to lower her guard with them? Even as little as she had done, here? Apparently even that had been too much. For if she had kept up her walls, her full walls, she wouldn't have said anything at all regarding planning a mission. Or what she knew about Umbar. Then they hadn't been able to piece it together, and Gladhron had never asked Ava what he had, at that tavern.
"And to discuss Ava, and what she might take away from what Gladhron said and how much of a problem that is. About how no one could say anything about any sort of mission to Umbar - in front of anyone, let alone in front of Ava. That any confirmation of what could only be a suspicion or a hope on her part, at present, would be detrimental. Gladhron and Gwestion... they... offered their help. To the mission."
"Then Ava and Tercen were brought in. Nothing was confirmed. She still does not
know anything. She can guess. She can hope. She can wonder if there is a plan involving Umbar. But she cannot
know if there is a plan, or a mission, let alone what the plan or mission might be. We - I... never gave her that.” She took a breath. It didn’t help. Not really.
"I laid out for everyone there, though, what the problem now was with Ava going back to Umbar. The problem - as far as I could see it. At the time," she amended.
"Option one: That we weren't planning anything, and my questions to Ava were fuelled by nothing more than my incessant need for information. Which, several of the rangers could tell anyone, is definitely part of my personality. Option two: That we were planning something, and my questions were fuelled by the need to make as good a plan as I may. Which, several of the rangers could tell anyone, would also align with my personality."
"I explained to everyone there that; if there was no plan at all - how, even if Ava was being honest with us, and even if she believed there was in fact no plan, she is only human. How the possibility would still exist that she might slip up and mention something, and that rumour could spread. Such a rumour, even an unfounded one, could then lead to retaliation against Gondor. About how the possibility also existed, that there are Umbarian spies here. And that it would be known where Ava was. How the possibility existed that Ava would be taken upon her return to Umbar, and that she would be pressured into talking. Through threats, against her, or against the people she was trying to protect. Through torture, of herself or of the people she was trying to protect. That would also likely lead Ava into mentioning she thought there was a plan - at least for a moment. And that, again, could be enough for the powers in Umbar to retaliate against Gondor. About the possibility that she was not being truthful with us at all. And that, upon her return, she would simply report back. And how that option was still one we had to consider. Because I had not been able to verify her claims objectively."
"I also explained to them that the same went in case there would in fact be a plan. Even if she was being honest with us and she was on our side, the possibility still existed that you she slip up and mention something. Which could not only lead to proactive retaliation, as I had already mentioned, but also to preparations that would surely see the plan fail before it was even set into motion. Leading to the deaths of anyone of us who might be participating in such a plan. The same possibility of her being pressured into talking also existed then, with the same possible consequences of relaliation and preparation and losses on our side. And if she was not being truthful with us - well. I didn't want to repeat myself, and I didn't have to."
"I told them that... The odds that, upon her return, she would not slip up, would not be found out and pressured, and would not report back anything - all of those together, were small. And the odds of any of the other possibilities - all of those together, were much higher."
"That it would have already been risky to let her return to Umbar as she had planned, before she started wondering about any possible plans. But now that you was in fact wondering, everything had changed. Because the risk, given the unacceptable consequences, was too high."
"Ava brought up her concerns over the people at her estate. Who would suffer if she did not return to supply the sacrifices demanded by the priest. The Captain... did not seem inclined to put Ava behind bars or keep her from returning to Umbar. And I was not inclined to fight it, either, because I figured... I figured Ava might prove an invaluable resource. If she truly did not mean us any harm. And while I could not be sure... yet... I figured I could be, in a few weeks time. I figured locking her up now would sour relations entirely, even if Ava meant to turn things around in Umbar. It would probably quench any and all of her willingness to help, even if she truly wanted change."
"I had been thinking, before that meeting at headquarters, about the possibility of sending a few rangers back to Umbar with Ava. To make good use of the possibilities such an 'in' would provide. Current information. Current lay outs. Current habits, rotations. Eyes on the ground. The possibility to refine my plans to such an extent that the odds of leaving with as many lives as possible intact would... increase exponentially. And it would allow us to watch Ava, too. Protect her, if she was true. Take her out, if she proved false."
"I asked to speak to the Captain alone, for I could tell she did not like the idea, for the danger the idea would pose to the rangers going with Ava." Arnyn's throat was dry. So dry, by now... Yet Arnyn ignored it. And continued.
"I reminded the Captain that we have no way of knowing whether or not Ava was telling the truth. That we could not just let her walk out of the city, where she might divulge the wrong information to the wrong people."
"I informed the Captain ofmy visit to the Guard Headquarters, and that I had given them Ava's description. How they had agreed to my request of not letting Ava leave the city. How I had also spoke with those who were already posted at the Great Gates. If she tried to leave, they would hold her and send word."
"I laid out how we had two choices. Either not let her go back... which she would fight. And if she did mean well, it would cost us an ally. Or - to monitor and steer her return as much as we could, by sending the right people with her. How I felt it was an option worth exploring seriously. Besides monitoring Ava's intentions, being more able to stop her from giving anyone information we wouldn't want getting out, and being able to provide additional protection from anyone who might try to take her in for questioning, it could give us a huge planning advantage. How I'd been wishing for ways to get a proper look at things there, like the harbour, the market, the temple. How it would be such an added value. I volunteered for it myself. Since it seemed, at the time, that Ava would only be returning after our own return from the sea training expedition. The Captain was not eager to let me go, given the dangers. I counterargued that was exactly why it should be me. To show everyone else that even though we think it is dangerous, it isn't hopeless. To show that the use outweighed the danger. To let our actions speak, not just our words."
"Ava and Tercen were also planning to take a little trip to Ithilien. Which I advised against," she added, as an almost sudden interjection, but it wasn't, since it led upto something else. "And I asked for permission to have rangers watch Ava, here, as well. In addition to the guard not letting her leave the city or the pelennor, and in addition to them keeping tabs on her whereabouts as she passed through this or that inner gate - that we could have a few rangers watching her, without her knowledge.To see she does not leave her house in the night. To see she does not try to make a run for it. But also to see whether anyone tries to enter her house in the night, without her knowledge.
"The Captain agreed, then. On me and some other rangers going back to Umbar, with Ava. On having someone verify the story of Ava's - about the parents and their daughter. On assigning rangers to watch her while she was still here. I issued and dispatched the first orders after the meetings - two of the unit have been watching her since this late afternoon."
Arnyn's eyes lowered again. "The Captain also asked for my opinion on Gladhron and Gwestion's earlier offer of help." Domanol was their friend, too, after all. "I could not paint them in a bad light," she admitted. "And had no professional reasons to advise the Captain against excluding them." The words tasted like ash. Given what had happened next... "I also told her that if we did not accept their offer, I was sure they would make the same offer to you, if they learned of your role in it all."
"We called the others back in, then. But Ava asked to speak to the Captain and myself alone, first. She wanted to discuss Tercen's request with us. Apparently he had asked her if he could join her in Umbar. And that she turned him down. But was torn about it and wanted our advice." But that was probably not relevant to Domanol. So Arnyn stopped there, abruptly, on that subject.
To return to the other. "Amidst that conversation, Ava mentioned that the temple demanded monthly sacrifices. I assumed that Ava could have some proxy arrange what was necessary in her absence - for otherwise we would no longer have weeks all of a sudden, but mere days. She disillusioned me rather quickly. Which also meant I could not both attend the sea training and go to Umbar with Ava. And as soon as we mentioned that in front of the brothers..." Her voice trailed off, even as she slowly shook her head. "
They volunteered," she finally finished.
"It was agreed on. As well as that I will join them, after the training has been completed. Ava gave us maps. To help me find my way, to otherwise give us more information about the city and surrounding area, if we could use it."
"Ava and Tercen left. Pele made sure the brothers knew the danger, before she left as well. And then I spent hours filling them in. On everything. Given what they are about to undertake." A mission she did not want them to undertake.
"And after that, I wrote up the orders. To verify the story. To have Ava watched. Dispatched them. I met with Kaylin. Asked for her help when I would be venturing to Umbar, later. She refused. I wrote up the report to the King." The Lieutenant fell silent. What had she missed? She frowned in thought. But found it hard to dig into any more memories...