Imladris Activities General OOC Thread

[The Good Hunter]

Hill Watch, Hunting Lodge, if you'll have me I'm down to help in any way I can! :smiley8:

[Moriel]

@Aigronding Mordagnir It looks like I have the old Hill Watch banner and ranks saved if you need/ want them :smiley8:

[Eriol]

Frosty, you could be a help by being one of the Watcher constables who helps keeps the peace in the four villages or Chetwood. I'm now beginning to think Forresters are Watchers, too, cops, but specifically make sure the forest is okay rather than observing what's going on in Bree-town, Archet, and Combe. There would be positions too you could have on the hill in a tower of old Cardolan where the headquarters is. For instance, Moriel's character is the warden. About the hunting lodge, these are the grounds from the old thread:

The Fellowship Hall:

A lounge for feasts and discussion. Storage for hunting equipment

Crafting room: A chamber in the northwest hall reserved for fashioning objects made from the material of slain animals.

Kennel: A large square chamber in the Lodge's northeast wing where hounds not owned by members can be rented for the hunt.

Aviary: A circular enclosure accessed amid the Fellowship Hal between the northwest and northeast wingsl; a hunter may rent one of the birds cared for within on the hunt.

Campground training site: A hunter ought to know how to camp when he or she is journeying through the wild. The basics can be taught outside in fair weather.

Hunting instruction site: A hunter can be taught how to pusue a beast in paths reserved for trainees in the Chetwood.

Would you like to be in charge of the crafting materials or being an instructor, @Frosty the Snowman ? Also, we need a kennelmaster who trains and looks after the hounds, rents them out. You could make profiles of each hound and put them in Rivendell Archives. We also need a falconer for the aviary to maintan it and care for the birds. Campground teacher is needed or hunting guide.

@Moriel , I'm looking forward to your moody ole guy again and his sweet little dog nobody can touch! Could you please send me the rank icons or post them here, please, and thank you! Let's hold off on the banner though. I'm still debating if I want to change the model for Sheriff Miles so he looks like David Harbour (@Ercassie 's idea years ago) and I'm not sure yet if I'll keep Kacey Rohl for Ann because I may want the Plaza version of her to be blonde now to reflect the changes I made to her character for my book(s); thinking both of Howard's daughters look like him instead of just Lauren who's always been blonde in Bree. I'll let you know soon. Have you got done with any of the banners or icons I needed from you lately?

[Moriel]

@Aigronding Mordagnir I'm afraid I have done exactly zero graphics work over the weekend for various reasons but I haven't forgotten and will get to it soon

[Eriol]

Thank you, Moriel, I'll be patient :smiley8: .

[Aerlinn]

You all are prolific.

Finally made it to The Four Winds. Anyone in Osdolen want to talk dogs , come say hi to Sirya. I've owned dogs in RL but am not really any sort of expert, so just making it up/Googling as I go. But we can do something with boarding resident dogs or you can borrow/buy/trade for kennel pups? I'll try to make up some profiles of hounds for people to take out for missions/hunting/training. And if you wanna just hang out at the kennels, or even hire on, feel free!

[The Good Hunter]

What's two more characters amongst the dozen or so I've created in the last two weeks? Put me down to help out as a Watcher constable and as far as instructors go... how about campground training? I actually know about backpacking and camping so it will be easy enough to write that sort of information into RPing.

[Eriol]

@Aerlinn , I'll have my young adult Ranger, Henry Cambel, buy a hound from Sirya and he'll be happy to help with the dogs! Should I wait for you to post the profiles? Feel free to display them in the Rivendell Archives.

@Frosty the Snowman , let me know your Bree-lander's name and I'll start a roster in the Rivendell Archives tomorrow! Your campground trainer's as well.

I'll post in the Pony, the House, Ost-Halatir, Osdolen, and will create the Hill Watch tomorrow on my day off.

[Burnt Toast]

@Baingíl Randír I don't know if you're still lurking about here- but I went meandering about Imladris, missing all the old Lorien threads and Mirkwood shenanigans, and saw your guard posts. I miss all of that! I think Manwathiel was a Dagnir, but for some reason I have a memory of earning the one 'near win' with the chief guard-- so maybe she made knight? Either way, Bain and Manwathiel are overdue for a catch up chat.


@Dwim -- Did Manwathiel and Nethalion ever interact? That name seems really familiar. Maybe I have to go digging...

[The Good Hunter]

*crackles knuckles* alright, Bree-lander, let's go with Eris Wyldroot, a 20 something girl who is setting out to join the constabulary to prove her father and his attitudes about place of women wrong.
And for my campground trainer is Hyáfrossä, a moriquendi born in the extreme north of Middle-Earth

I'll have a much fuller description of both gals that I can put in the Character Submission Thread by the end of the weekend.

[Eriol]

We both have an Eris, @Frosty the Snowman ! Mine is a demon of Angband, a fallen Maia of Manwe. I love yours already, she's strong ! I wonder if your Dark Elf has skated with the Lossoth! I'll make the Hill Watch roster shortly, working on Osdolen presently.

@Moriel , I'm going to post the Mantle of Darkness RPG tomorrow since it's been a week for sign-ups already. Let me know when have the banner; I'll have a place holder until then

[The Good Hunter]

Great minds @Aigronding Mordagnir! Though I can't take too much credit for mine, I pulled the name out of thin air. I got confused for a second with the dark elf skating comment I have an orc that can disguise himself as a black skinned elf then I realized you were referring to Hyáfrossä. Tolkien dark elves and DnD dark elves are very different things :P

[Moriel]

Sounds good Aig! I am working on the banner now but my computer is older and slower now and compositing is more tedious

[Eriol]

@Frosty the Snowman , you're a Drow fan as well then! I've been reading The Legend of Drizzt from Forgotten Realms for quite some time now! From Homeland all the way to the Crystal Shard and plenty more to come. I've been a fan of RA Salvatore's from since he wrote Star Wars: The New Jedi Order - Vector Prime over twenty years ago for the Expanded Universe. I haven't got to read Elaine Cunningham's Drow novels but I hear they're excellent. I like her, too. She's the author of Star Wars: The New Jedi Order - Dark Journey about Jaina Solo's brief brush with the Dark Side in the wake of her youngest brother's murder and her twin's capture in the Yuuzhan Vong War. Seems like there's many Forgotten Realms authors in the EU.

Thanks, @Moriel ! We appreciate the effort! . Loving your model for Abrazan, by the way! THE MACKENZIE!

[Moriel]

@Aigronding Mordagnir Have a banner! I have a working copy so if there's anything you hate about it let me know. Reviving banner making skills after a couple years, oy

[Eriol]

I'll take it, @Moriel ! love the texture :smiley8: ! I'm happy to get you back into the swing of banner-making again.

[Celebrin]

@Aigronding Mordagnir I tend to stay out of this thread but decided to poke my nose in here and find Aig talking about Drizzt. Bro! I've read Homeland through The Spine of the World, though I could never bring myself to get into Sea of Thieves. The series started losing my interest after so many books lol I also own the majority of all those novels with Drizzt. Those first 2 books pull you all the way in. I wish my mind would let me finish it all lol

[The Good Hunter]

@Aigronding Mordagnir I love the drow! Salvatore was a favorite of mine for many a year. I'll confess though I haven't really kept up with the adventures of Drizzt past Spine of the World, the lure of cosmic horror pretty much swallowed me up but I did recently buy Homeland on Audible so there's a chance at a comeback! Also, I'll admit to never reading much Star Wars, though I do have a very basic understanding of all the references you just made

@Moriel That looks amazing!

[Eriol]

I know it's a lot of books, bro, I'll see at what point I want to stop reading :smiley8: ! There's got to be a point where Salvatore should have just ended the saga. He should be like Terry Brooks, finally finishing Shannara after 30+ years this summer, and let the curtain fall. I hear the plot gets redundant after a while. I like Drizzt's story, this black-skinned silver-haired Dark Elf raised among evil who wants to escape the wickedness of his race and do good in the world. I want Drizzt to be out of the Underdark; I like him being outside of Drow territory and having adventures with his companions.

I recommend reading Dragonlance, too, @Celebrin ! It's in the same D&D vein of the Forgotten Realms books. It was one of the many high fantasy sagas (a shared universe like the FR novels) awaiting me after I was done with Middle-earth.

@Frosty the Snowman , I'm overjoyed knowing that all three of us are big Drow fans :smiley8: !! Haha, you and Celebrin are so many books ahead of me! I love horror!! I'm reading HP Lovecraft's complete works now. Edgan Allan Poe, Stephen King, Bram Stoker, Mary Shelley, Anne Rice, and Dean Koontz are some of my favorite writers.

[The Good Hunter]

If we're coming up with D&D inspired fantasy, you MUST check out Malazan Book of the Fallen. I've only read the first two books but wow! It started as a campaign that outgrew D&D and moved on to GURPS rules to expand the universe better and make the magic more sensical. I kinda gave on Shannara too! after a while it felt like Brooks was stuck in a pattern with his novels and they got too predictable. Good, though, but not quite good enough to want to devour every single book he put out. And let's not talk about that TV series

[Eriol]

I've read Gardens of the Moon and now I'm reading the Deadhouse Gates (which is more entertaining for me) :smiley8: !! I admire the worldbuilding! Shannara was, I admit, wonderful until Voyage of the Jerle Shannara series was finished. After that, it gets pretty stale but I feel the need to finish it since I've been in the long haul for so long, almost twenty years of reading. Word & Void urban fantasy trilogy was enthralling and his books surrounding that genesis prequel era but the stories after my girl Grianne Ohmsford are not as great as his previous work. The Shannara TV series was awful and it did not honor Terry's phenomenal classic books of the saga well. Elfstones is reputed to be the best volume and it's my favorite. Jon Favreau slaughtered the adaptation. He does well with Marvel but that's it. Like JJ Abrams, he has no understanding or respect for beloved established mythos; he does what he wants with the canon material and gives us a lackluster retelling . Don't get me started on what he did with Jacen and Jaina Solo .

[The Good Hunter]

@Aigronding Mordagnir we could go on forever with how bad the Shannara series was and I only watched the first episode before unleashing a torrent of expletives. It was so, so, so bad. There was nothing that was right about any of it. There some good actors but they were so badly miscast (Jon Rhys-Davies).

You know, once you finish Lovecraft (my personal favorites are 'Shadow over Innsmouth' and 'Call of Cthulhu') you need check out Algernon Blackwood, he came before Lovecraft and his two most famous stories, 'The Willows' and 'The Wendigo' blow away anything Lovecraft ever wrote. A couple of modern guys you need check out are Laird Barron ('The Imago Sequence and Other Stories') and John Langan ('The Wide Carnivorous Sky and Other Monstrous Geographies'). You might not sleep well after but you'll be better for them. I promise.

[Eriol]

The actors (some of them I've been fans of before this) were just fine, it was just Jon Favreau's utter disrespect and sheer desecration of the Shannara mythos which was the problem. The story of the show was absymally appalling . I'll look those authors up on Amazon and GoodReads, my friend :smiley8: !

Well, I managed to get the Pony and Osdolen done from my list above! I'll see what I can get done after work tonight. Anyone taking the role as leader to Esteldin (another LOTRO location) where the Grey Company is, you may assume the role of Halbarad until the end of this thread/mission. You can either run the quest in the Osdolent hread or in the Paths of Eriador one. Regarding the Chetwood assignment, that can be carried to the Hill Watch RP I'm going to make before the weekend is through and it can thereafter be continued in the Bree-land Free RP. Cheers!

[Taethowen]

Any interested elven folk are invited to participate in the relaunched Miss/ter Meduseld competition!

The 2020 Miss/ter Meduseld Pageant (part of the Edoras Summer Festival) will be OPEN FOR PARTICIPANT SIGN-UPS June 18-19!

Sign-ups are LIVE!

ALL are welcome to participate, regardless of Kingdom!

[Moriel]

@Aigronding Mordagnir Well it looks like Gellam is up for leading the Mirkwood contingent, at least for now! I'll bring him into Ost-Halatir soon :smiley8: I'm also trying to dissect exactly what Khallador wants in Osdolen. Halbarad is going to be leading a company that's going to go kill orcs, and someone else is going to lead a company to go find the wood cutters? Is that right? And you're also looking for somebody to volunteer to play Halbarad?

[Almarëa Mordollwen]

@Aigronding Mordagnir Speaking of other contingents, now that Moriel has reminded me by bringing up Mirkwood, I will create an NPC to head up the Lórien contingent.

[Eriol]

That's all correct , @Moriel , but seems like we don't have enough Rangers for both like I was hoping for. @Ercassie advised me that Trestlebridge could be just with Rangers to kill the Orcs and that the Hill Watch could look for the woodcutters on their own. Khallador can send a message to Miles; I think @Quill wants to make a mail thread soon. Yes, whoever leads the team to Halbarad's outpost can RP Halbarad who captains the group as the Grey Company.

Thanks for leading the contingent, @Almarëa Mordollwen !

I'll post in Ost-Halatir tomorrow finally. Got a couple days off now and can get plenty of writing done in Imladris and Gondor.

Thanks for the invite, @Taethowen ! I hope to get to Rohan sometime this year.

[Moriel]

Does it have to be Halbarad though Aig? I'd be happy lead the orc killing team, but I'd rather only play one character and have it be Grath. Moot point if someone else wants to take on Halbarad of course :smiley8:

[Dimcairien Luiniel]

Yay @Almarëa Mordollwen. I'll try and get Artanis over there soon. Never did the proper army RPs in the past, but in her bio she fought in the Last Alliance, so she technically has army experience.

[Eriol]

I thought having Halbarad was always a staple of the Osdolen threads. Okay, you can decline and have Grath say she'll lead it? I'll have to think of what's going to happen with Halbarad.

[Moriel]

It's your thread, so if you're married to the idea of having Halbarad lead it that's ok! I'm happy to wait for someone else to take him on and join with Grath as a party member, I just don't want to get too spread out.

[Ercassie]

That's all correct , @Moriel , but seems like we don't have enough Rangers for both like I was hoping for. @Ercassie advised me that Trestlebridge could be just with Rangers to kill the Orcs and that the Hill Watch could look for the woodcutters on their own. Khallador can send a message to Miles;

Well, we have to leave something for your Hillwatch to do, @Aigronding Mordagnir Can’t be letting the Rangers have all the fun ! Particular since those gathered so far seem mostly to be staples of Osdolen itself, rather than for Ranging abroad.

Looking forward to Ost-Halatir getting going !

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

Hi Rivvies,

Hope we see some Elves on the water this summer!

ARE YOU UP FOR AN ADVENTURE LIKE NO OTHER?

SIGN UP, ME HEARTIES!

viewtopic.php?f=12&t=309

THIS EDORAS SUMMER FESTIVAL CLASSIC
KICKS OFF SATURDAY, 20TH JUNE 2020.

ENTRANTS FROM ACROSS MIDDLE-EARTH WELCOMED

[Eriol]

Okay, @Ercassie , we'll save the woodcutters in the Hill Watch I'll remake. Yes !! Ranging abroad is being Rangery !! Can't get too cozy.

Thanks for the fun invite, Aodh!

[Ercassie]

@Aigronding Mordagnir. I swear it is not just because a certain villain for the Woodcutters RP thinks that local Hillwatch will be less threat to their plans there, than a bunch of Rangers would …

[Eriol]

Typical classy arrogant villain but, at present, the rustic hometown heroes of the Hill Watch pose more of a threat to him (and potentially three Moles) . Ann and Miles and Clay (if he'll be there) will certainly have bragging rights after this fight is over .

Quill, I'm going to post again in Ost-Halatir tonight for us

I changed Adult Roina's model in the post but I'll switch out her pics in my Aigo segments when I have more time this week; need to concentrate on writing.

[Eriol]

@Nen I want you to be as excited and as ambitious as Charlie!! The Plaza is back and there's plenty to do everywhere. We could use more Rangers here and soon I'll get the Hill Watch up for Bree. Elves are in motion well. You can create an experienced soldier; because you were involved so much back in the day and are enthused right now you can have the rank of either a Tirn (third rank) or Authon (fourth rank, higher leader rank) in the Imladris Guard; if you want a Lindon one instead I can give you the third rank for that. Moriel is leading the Mirkwood host and can give you a rank from what Baingil has showed us or if you're making a Lorien Guard, Alma is leading the contingent and can give you a rank for that host. You know I love working ou complicated elven histories, so you're okay! This is a FANATICS Plaza so it's permissable!

[Nen]

@Aigronding Mordagnir Aaaaaah! You're not good for my health, Aig! I'd forgotten how convincing you could be!!! Just give me a wee bit of time to think about whether I can handle an elven soldier right now. I'm actually expecting to be loaded with work from next week!

However, I do have a very young elf from Mirkwood, scared out of her wits, and making her way towards the maze to get into Rivendell. Her father was accused of treason and he took her and ran. But, he hasn't made it across, and she is all alone and afraid. I was wondering if she could be of any use in the RPG you guys are currently setting up. I don't have a history for her as yet. This is all I've got.

[Eriol]

I've been told many times I'm a good salesman, @Nen ! I know what you mean, I'm loaded with a lot of shift work but these next two weeks I have more hours to myself; leaves more time for writing. No worries, I'll give you a week !

When you say her father is accused of treason, do you mean he was charged with an alliance with Orcs? I had mentioned in Ost-Halatir a day ago with quotes from Fellowship that Orcs are strengthening in the mountains. Some attacked Mirkwood, Legolas said at the Council. If you don't mean the father is suspected of treachery through an alliance with Orcs, do you mean he was considered to be planning a rebelion against Thranduil? And left to escape the falsehood and punishment? She's an adult or it would be the father who's in the Guard (if he's still alive, he's got separated from the daughter?) Sorry for all the questions, trying to sort things out.

Gandalf says in Fellowship of the Ring that the Elves will no longer serve Sauron or listen to him so assuming he was an agent of the Dark Lord wouldn't work. Vying for kingship of Mirkwood maybe but....how about we just say that he wanted to escape the dangers of Mirkwood to take his daughter somewhere safe like Rivendell or Lindon over the mountains and that they got separated in the Crossing? If you don't want to wait for our Orc/Dragon RPG taking place in Wilderland, Quill and I could find the girl and her father during our mission that's happening in Ost-Halatir. Quill is a little busy right now with school and practicing harp for a wedding she told me yesterday and that she'd back after finals.

[Nen]

@Aigronding Mordagnir I don't mind the questions, Aig. Like I said, I don't have anything laid out for Mistriel except for her name, (her face), and the fact that she is scared out of her wits.

Currently, I would prefer to go with the idea that her father was killed by an orc scouting party, but he had managed to make sure she had escaped before fighting to his death. She likely does not know as yet that her father is fallen. Or perhaps she has an inkling he does. I see how treason might not work as there couldn't have possibly been an uprising at this time within Mirkwood. At least, I don't think so. Perhaps, her father killed one of his own people by accident in a skirmish with orcs, and in the heat of the moment, without thinking, he ran? A cowardly action, yes. But I'm thinking the elf he killed in the skirmish was likely someone he was having a huge quarrel with and it was highly unlikely that fellow elves would have justified it as an accident but an intent to kill.

Roughly what years are we playing here in Imladris? Accordingly I could set my little elf's age. I don't think she is more than three hundred to three hundred and fifty years old. And yes, I guess it would make sense if she was found by the Lorien Guard on patrol. So, I'm cool with that if it works well for you and Quill.

And thanks for the extra week, Aig! *glomps* I have a character, or the model of a character, I would dearly love to play. She has to be a Noldor elf. I can't imagine her as any other character. But drumming up the history is really frightening. That plus the fact she might have to become a character that is known to all the others in the Valley because she was born at the start of the Second Age. As you can tell...I've already been thinking about this!!!!

[Nolewen]

@Aigronding Mordagnir Greetings, Aig. Elsilner (a former Tirn) has returned and is willing to lay his sword once more at the feet of his commander. What does the Tar-Taidron command?

[Eriol]

I like that name, means 'Straying Daughter', I think. I like the nothin of them being separated, @Nen , and the father being ashamed of friendly fire against his adversary. We should go with that! Well, we decided to go with TA 3014 by popular demand when I began making my batch of Imladris Activities here weeks ago but there are some people doing some "flashback RP'ing" but let's keep this in the modern day. 350 years is a young adult and that's okay (Morgoth's Ring in the Histories of Middle-earth says that Elves reach adulthood at 50 years and fully matured at 100 so think of those numbers as equivalents to our human 18 and 21 years. Quill and I are Imladris Guards but Alma leads the Lorien contingent. I could have a Lorien Guard NPC, one of Aigronding's relatives by his eldest daughter's marriage, find Mistriel in the same Host quest I have with Quill though; I had alluded to the presence of lost Guards in the cavern she and I are about to go in which has some Orcs. Is Mistriel the Noldorin Elf you want? If she's Noldo, she'll have to be part Silvan or Grey Elf who came to Mirkwood to explain her Noldorin lineage I think. I'll help you!!

@Nolewen , welcome back !!!! I was just telling @Ercassie days ago how much I missed you and that I hoped you would register on New Plaza!!!

Aigronding happily accepts the sword of Tirn Elsilner, his faithful warrior. The Tar-Taidron will ask Elsilner to join Tavari's group, Nolewen. They're undertaking a mission to the foothills of the Misty Mountains a few days south of Rivendell to check on a host camp which might become (has become) besieged by an Orc horde. Crush them :smiley8: !

[Nen]

@Aigronding Mordagnir Yep! That's what her name means! :D If it's TA 3014 then Mistriel should be 314 years old. She is a Silvan elf with brown hair and brown eyes. I'll go with whatever you feel is best. I'm okay with either of your ideas to come across Mistriel.

Btw, did you, by any chance, save the Dol Amroth chracter description thread, Aig? I was reminded of it when I bumped into Ercassie's familiar NPC. I can't for the life of me recall the name of the character I played then, except that he was absolutely cheeky and was an intelligence gatherer for Prince Imrahil.

[Eriol]

Until Quill is able to get in her second post for our quest, I'll have my Lorien girl find Mistriel while she's scouting, @Nen , and bring her back to the core group of hers inside the caves after a little interaction between us. I've got four days off starting tomorrow so I'll get in a post for us during that time and tag you so you know it's up. We could find the dad in the embattled Vales of Anduin in the upcoming Dragon/Orc RPG once Moriel's mission concludes if you like! Does Mistriel know how to fight yet and is she armored at all?

Unfortunately, I don't have that Dol Amroth thread saved but it could be found, hopefully, in the Way Back Machine which exists as our Archives place now.

[Dimcairien Luiniel]

Speaking of archive threads, I know I started the one in here as primarily a Lorien one, but I can easily expand it to Elven Lands. Just post the url links to the the threads (please include location in a description) and I can add them to the OP. Or any other items such as icons, etc. can be added.

I can go make a placeholder posts for things such as military or healing if that is of interest to anyone.

Trying to gather stuff will make searching for threads easier in the long run, hopefully.

[Eriol]

That's a lovely idea, @Dimcairien Luiniel !! That will be quite helpful.

[Dimcairien Luiniel]

@Aigronding Mordagnir So far I have Character bio, Icons - ruler, SCR, general. Threads - general RP, games, IK stuff and have just added posts for military and healing. Can you think of any other categories that would be useful to have a post for?

[Nen]

That sounds good, @Aigronding Mordagnir! And yes, finding her dad later does sound like a lovely idea! :D

Mistriel isn't battle hardened. She is good with a bow which she had to train in using because of the threats within Mirkwood. However, she hasn't seen much action beyond the spiders. Save for when they came across the orcs on the run. I'd think when she is found she'll have lost her bow, her quiver would be empty, and all she'd have is a dagger in her hand, dressed in a forest green robe with a leather vest, and leather braces on her forearms.


@Dimcairien Luiniel Wow! That's a lot of hard work on the archives. Thank you. :D Also, if it helps, I was Galadriel L8. At the time my user name was Nenedhel Engrin.

I went to check and see if I had any character bios up there, and guess what? I have four in the Wilderlands alone...and I remember none of them!!! Save for Nen Lalaith....but it would appear that Nen Lalaith has undergone several character changes, descriptions and shifts until she has morphed into the current Gondorian woman I am playing -- Lalaith.

[Nolewen]

@Aigronding Mordagnir I've missed you too, Aig. So glad to be back! Seeing your name registered here (amsuingly enough, I've only known you (your official username) as Aigronding Mordagnir for a short time, right when I first joined the Plaza, though you were always Aig) and the revived threads, new and shining and yet so much alike all the old places where we used to wander (though Angmar has not yet been restored, I understand it's in progresss, too) made me very happy. And back to Rivendell, too. :smiley8:

[Dimcairien Luiniel]

@Nen Thanks for letting me know. I'll add that in later today. I know I need to update some of icon stuff as there has been a lot of work done on it in CoLP.

And everyone, please post links to threads, share images, etc, from the Wayback machine if you have found them. I can't compile the entire history of the elven lands all by myself.